WHERE WERE YOU ON 9-11?

I cant believe it's been 5 years. Time really does move on no matter what. It never stands still, even if it sometimes feels like it does.
I can remember 9-11-01 like it was yesterday. Its so vivid and fresh in my mind. 5 years hasnt done anything to blur it either.
I woke up that morning to take my boys to the doctor for their physicals. (Normally, I would of been travelling to lower manhattan to drop the boys off at school and then travel back up to midtown for work. I thank God this was the case.) I met a cousin of mine and her son at the doctors. Her son was getting a physical examination as well. While at the doctors office, I kept getting calls from my boyfriend. I couldnt answer the phone because we were being seen by the doctor. When I got a chance, I went outside to call him. He wanted to know if I was okay and to tell me that a plane had crashed into the WTC. I didnt believe him. I told him that if that was his idea of a joke, that it wasnt funny. He told me he wasnt joking. We ended the conversation shortly after but I still didnt believe him. I walked into the doctors office and told the nurse that I had heard that a plane had crashed into the WTC and she told me that she had heard the same thing as well. But as we both said it, it still didnt seem like it had really happened. When we left the doctors office, we got in the car and tuned into the radio. The radio repeated what my boyfriend had told me and then thats when it hit me. A plane crashed into the World Trade Center. It really happened. I was in shock. We drove back to my cousins house and watched it all on tv. I couldnt believe it then even though I was watching it. We didnt know what to say or what to do. Then it hit me that I had another cousin who worked there. She worked at WTC. I was frantic to reach her. Ok, I was more than frantic, I was hysterical. We were hysterical. I couldnt get through to her. I kept calling but cell phone lines were jammed. Finally, she picked up the phone. I was never in my life so happy to hear her voice. I just cried and cried. She told me that she was supposed to go into work later than usual. What a relief! I was lucky but what about the families that never were able to feel that relief. My parents and brother were frantically trying to reach me to find out if we were okay. They too were stunned about the events. I tried to explain to the boys what was happening when I really didnt know myself. Although in the back of my mind, I knew it was an attack. One plane crashes could be an accident, but 2 planes is no longer a coincidence. I left my cousin and her son to go to my boyfriends house. His friends and some family were gathered there. We watched the news for about the next 48 hours. I tried to distract my boys with other things so as not to traumatize them the way I felt I was. I was in shock, I felt disbelief, awe, greatful to be alive, sad for the dead, and enormous sadness.
I still feel sad for everyone who has been touched by that day. It still hurts. I feel bad for the people who died in the towers. I feel bad for the firemen (How lucky are we to have such heroic people in our lives). Bad for the widows. Bad for the orphans. Bad for the siblings. Bad for the volunteers who are now suffering from all type of lung disorders. Bad for everyone who was directly or indirecly affected by this traumatic event.
Luckily, I no longer think of 9-11 everyday like I used to, but its there. The memory is in me and I suspect it will never go away.
I just pray that God will be with us all.